It's Ironic

Today, I am at home- sick. Being sick is no fun- especially as a mother. This morning I had to get my girls up and out of the house before I threw up on them. Yep- the stomach bug has hit our home. Emma got it late Saturday night and has since passed it on to me. 

It's ironic because yesterday with her not feeling good, I was enjoying her wanting to cuddle with me and hold her and have her sit on my lap as we watched movies all day. Kaitlyn was even being nice to her- which is a rarity. TODAY,I am feeling none of those things. TODAY, I feel quite hellish as I try to take care of myself. As I do the 6th load of laundry between the two of us. As I try to catch up on work. As I try to take care of myself. 

It's ironic because I love taking care of others- specifically my husband and daughters. I take great joy in rubbing their back as they lay on the couch. I know this is kind of unpleasant to think about, but I truly enjoy it. I can't be the only one. I like that I can make them feel better. I like that being their mom, I get first dibs on taking care of them. 

It's ironic because I absolutely hate taking care of myself. It's a real problem I have. I'm sure both sides of motherhood can agree. Whether you're a working mom or a stay-at-home mom, one thing I always read about, hear about, or see {about :/} is that mothers typically have a hard time treating themselves or sometimes even doing small things to take care of themselves.

Last month I actually did something about it and went out on a Girls Day Out with my sister-in-law. We kept it super simple. We went to get pedicures and then went to Ikea- sans children. We were gone for the afternoon and it was perfect. There was a kind of theme going on: YOLO. You only live once. We got the Deluxe Pedicure. So yeah, we totally lived it up.   :)

Friday Favorites

This girl. 
She's definitely a favorite of mine. I love her to pieces and 
cannot imagine my life without her. She is beautiful, kind, smart, compassionate, determined, talkative, thoughtful, curious,funny, 
and such a joy to be around. Her favorite food is hot dogs and her favorite song is "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." She still likes to cuddle me and sit on my lap whenever she gets the chance. She made me a mother and I will forever be eternally grateful to her. 

Friday Favorites

This is the start of a new beginning. 

A weekly series. 

Something I will try to attain every week. 

Welcome to Friday Favorites. 

I'm hoping this will get me in the habit of regularly posting. :) 

Here we go: Post #1. 

My life can be pretty mundane. Get up, get myself ready, get the girls ready, leave the house, go to work, stay there for what seems like forever (on most some days), get in the car, pick the girls up, go home, dinner, shower , dishes, fold laundry (or not), watch a little Netflix with the husband- if we're lucky, go to bed. Wake up- repeat. 

Now, sometimes this gets me a bit down. It's not always fun to do the same thing day in- day out. I mean, I don't know about you, but I need a little excitement in my life. Sometimes that involves making plans for the weekend, having a family date night, planning on watching a full length movie (in one sitting, no less), creating something, or even trying a new recipe. Friday Favorites is going to encourage me to look at the things I live everyday and find the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful. 

This week, this includes a new plant and some new pictures I've put up in my house. Emma asked me the other day why I buy new things all the time. I informed her that I don't buy things all the time, but I do like to get some new things, sometimes, to make our house more beautiful and more comfortable. We have only scratched the surface is making our home "ours". We have a long ways to go.

First up, my new plant. We got this bad boy from Lowe's two weeks ago. I'm in love. I love the vibrancy it brings to this little corner of our kitchen. It smells good and puts off a good vibe. I'm quite obsessed with green plants these days. This has been a great addition to our kitchen. I've had the pot for awhile now. Waiting for the perfect plant to put in it. This only set me back $12.98. Quite a steal, if you ask me. Now, to keep it alive. 

Second, my new pictures. I love pictures. Like LURVE them. Especially when they are pictures of my favorite people. These two pictures make me happy every time I pass them. Every. Single. Time. I can't help but smile. These girls are beautiful and my absolute favorite people in the world. I got the frames from Ikea, they are these. And for $6, that's something I can handle. I developed the pictures at Walgreens with a 40% discount and $15 later, I have this wall I adore. I used poster board as the mat and just taped the pictures right in the center. Ikea frames are such an odd size, this was the easiest, cheapest way to get a mat. I'm really pleased with how it turned out. Black and white for the win!   

I want this Friday Favorites to be a place where I embrace all that is good in my life. To showcase some of my favorite things I've experienced in the week. I have so many things I'm grateful for and truly love in my life. I'll just start documenting it, now. :)

Cruising- Part 1

This last week (January 31- February 7) we were away on a family vacation. Our entire family traveled to San Juan, Puerto Rico to set sail on the Jewel of the Seas- a Royal Caribbean ship. To say it was amazing would be the understatement of the year. 

It. Was. Amazing. 

This was my first cruise and it was definitely a daily adventure, especially with our two little sand monsters. The girls had a great time and thought they were hot stuff the entire week. 

There were 16 of us total. <Surprisingly enough, I didn't get a picture of everyone. I think maybe someone else did.> 

Two parents, four siblings plus spouses, and six children. 

Needless to say with our circus group, a lot of people recognized us by the end of the cruise. Getting on and off of elevators was quite a sight. Clown car anyone? Yeah, we're awesome. 

DAY 1- January 31

Day one started with our flight out of Salt Lake City to the beautiful city of San Juan, Puerto Rico. We arrived very late 

that night. The minute we got off the plane and walked through 

the airport- in air conditioning, no less- I don't think I 

could have prepared myself for what lay ahead...outside. 

Humidity. Oh, sweet humidity. I hate your guts. 

I lived with you when I was in St. Louis, but since moving to Utah I have not thought twice about you. You suck. My hair and I were not impressed. The minute we stepped outside, my hair curled in unruly spurts and we were instantly hot and sweaty. Talk about a shock to your system. We then stood in line for a good 40 minutes before we got a taxi and went to our hotel for the night.  

DAY 2- February 1

We woke up this morning ready to start our day. I think we were all excited to start our new adventure we had been talking about for over a year. We had breakfast downstairs in the hotel and caught up with the rest of family who had arrived the day earlier in the afternoon. We had some time to kill before we had to board the ship. We headed to the beach which was just down the street from us. 

The girls each got a new swim suit and were thrilled when we told them they could put them on. They also couldn't wait to wear their flip flops. We walked down and took up our spot right near the water. The waves were quite strong so we didn't really get in the water. Kaitlyn wasn't sure about the water and sat on my lap the whole time we were there. Emma loved running from the waves and playing in the sand. Sand is the worst. Especially with small children. When we got back to the hotel room and got both girls in the shower, there was sand everywhere. 
And when I say everywhere, I mean everywhere. It was amazing. 
We cleaned up, had lunch in town, and then proceeded to the ship. 

The check-in process was pretty easy. They had a ton of check points. I guess they want to make sure you are who you say you are...six times. Once we got on board, we headed straight to the buffet. For those of you who have never been on a cruise, expect to eat your weight in buffet food. There is food readily available at all times. All. Day. Long. No joke. I'm still having withdrawals as I type this.  From here, we go to our stateroom- which is smaller than you would think. There was a queen bed (two twins pushed together) and two bunk-bed-like beds that folded out from the ceiling. The girls loved these beds. And, good news, no one fell out. That was always a relief waking up and seeing both girls tucked snugly in their beds. Or, in Kaitlyn's case, sitting up looking at me- willing me to wake. We had dinner in the dining room that night and then went out to the ship deck to watch us push off. This was quite a sight. They brought in these huge ropes that were attaching us to the dock, they sounded the horn and we embarked on our 7-day cruise. After that, we danced with the kids. By now, it was quite late so our children went to hang out with their cousins and a few of us went to Karaoke. Ben and I performed "Love Shack." Sadly, no pictures were taken. However, take it from me, we both looked amazing and sounded awesome. :) We slept quite good that night. I think it was the best night sleep we had the entire week. I felt a little nauseous, but when I woke the next morning, I was feeling great and ready to take on St. Thomas. 

Goals

Goals. To me, this can sometimes be a four-letter-word. You know the one you say and then instantly feel bad about. For me, I feel bad because I have been known to set goals and then not attain them. And that makes me sad. Especially when you write them down, come across them throughout the year, and realize none of them are underway. Like not even close. 

Sometimes I feel like I'm setting myself up for failure. You know what I mean?

Not this year. This year I have two important goals. One is a personal goal and the second is a family goal that we came up with together. 

Personal Goal: 

FINISH. 

Seriously, that's all. Finish. 

Start something and then finish it. 

Commence something and finish. 

Or, finish something that has already been started. 

For those of you who have seen my kitchen...yea.

I started crocheting a blanket for Kaitlyn while I was still pregnant. Honestly, this was three years ago I started this. Recently I came across said blanket. It was a hot mess. It had been moved around one too many times. So, I cut the cord (literally and figuratively) and started a different project- finishing off the yarn I had purchased and started on years ago. 

I have made two scarves with this yarn. One for Emma and one for Kaitlyn. This makes me extremely happy. Not only because I finally finished a project I started about three years ago, but because I was able to make something for my girls, that they will love and cherish. Well, at least for the next few months. Hello, Winter Wonderland. 

I love being creative and making things with my hands. Here's another story about when I was pregnant with Kaitlyn. It was a Sunday morning and Ben and I started nailing some board and batten on our kitchen walls. This was a Sunday in July and it was excruciating hot. And I was 8 1/2 months pregnant. We decided to put our nail gun down and take Emma to the neighborhood pool. Long story short, about 8 hours later, Kaitlyn Nicole was born. That kitchen is still not finished. Everyday, it looks at me and taunts me into finishing it. I always make excuses...I need a new sander. I'm too tired. I need to do laundry. I'm feeling lazy today. I would rather take my children to the park. I'd rather just eat in the living room so I don't have to look at it. Nope. Not this year. I'm gonna finish those kitchen walls like my life depended on it. 

Because, at this time in my life, it does. 

Last year, I had a hard time. I felt like I was personally and professionally at a stand still. I was always tired and I wasn't happy where I was as an employee. I felt like I had no control and if something didn't get done, I was always ready with an excuse. Not. This. Year. Nope. Nuh-huh. I'm taking control. This is just one way to do that. FINISH. 

<here is that kitchen wall in all its glory. also, i need to take down this merry christmas sign>

Family Goal: 

TRY NEW THINGS.

My husband is, what some would call, a home-body. He loves to stay home. He'd rather not go out. Ever. He has consistently claimed that he would be totally and completely happy if he lived in the mountains with no one around for miles. Well, except for his family. :) He likes us just fine. However, with his home-bodiedness (that's a word), it has been difficult to try new things. It's like if we do, it isn't up to snuff and he'd have been happier if we had just had dinner at home. Or the girls misbehave, or something is spilled or dropped and we all start crying...while we're trying to order drinks. Not this year. This year, we are going to try new things, and we're going to enjoy it. 

This past weekend, we started this goal by trying a new restaurant we have never tried, but have mentioned on multiple occasions that we would love to try it. We did. It wasn't that great, but we did it. We also saw a movie that afternoon with the wandering Kaitlyn. She last about 45 minutes. And then we spent some time walking back and forth in the back of the theater. And then we went out to the hall. It was a lot of fun! No, but seriously. I'm really glad we tried these things. 

This year, courtesy of my parents, we have passes to Thanksgiving Point and we're looking forward to trying that out throughout the year and seeing what it's all about. 

We also went ice skating as a family for the first time. Although, now that I think about it, I don't think Ben and I have ever been ice skating together. Ever. Turns out it's a lot of fun and our girls thoroughly enjoyed themselves. Here's proof. 

I'm glad I have these two goals this year. I feel as though they are attainable. 

We started a bathroom a few months ago and we WILL get it finished this year. 

All because of my goal. 

Just kidding. ;)

Bathroom Reno. Day 1 & 2

Yes, you read that correctly. We have officially started our bathroom 

renovation on our upstairs loo. 

Three years ago, I started day dreaming about out upstairs bathroom. I devoured Pinterest, read every blog and tutorial, and watched way too many YouTube videos. 
Two weekends ago, we headed to our local Lowe's and bought $1,300 worth of supplies. 

These supplies include but are not limited to: 

Tile, Grout, Grout Sealant, Thin set, Hardi Backerboard, Special screws for said Backerboard, Fibratape for the Backerboard, Shower valves, Tub, Window

This past weekend we stripped everything down to its underpants studs. 

Oh, yes, the bathtub is in our backyard as we speak. We are those people. 

Here are some pictures and descriptions.

Step 1 was removing the old tile. The longest wall was the easiest because there was a lot of water damage. Which means tiles were already barely  hanging on. Which means the Backerboard behind it was water-damaged as well. It was quite the dirty job, but it was totally invigorating as well. I've been wanting to do that since we moved in 3 1/2 years ago. :) The two short walls were more difficult because there was no water damage. These were a bit tougher to pry remove from the wall. 

Step 2 was removing the insulation and bathtub. 

Step 3 includes cleaning everything up. This one I am not looking forward to. 

All of this was hard work. My hands are scratched up, my back hurts, and that room is currently filthy and drafty as all get-out (the insulation has been thrown out). However, I am so proud of it, it's ridiculous. We're actually renovating our bathroom ourselves. Can I get a hallelujah! Some good thoughts our way would be nice as well, as we tackle our pipes in the near future. Good thing my handy hubby knows what he's doing. :)

I am so proud of us, I can't even stand it.
No, seriously. I can't stand it. I wish it were just done already. Oh well, I guess those are the breaks when you DIY.:) 

Routines

Routines, who needs them? Me- I do. I need them very badly. I'm a mess without them. Anyone else?

FACT: I am a mom.I have two daughters. I wish I could give them everything I can. I fear, everyday, that I am making bad choices and mistakes that will affect them in the future. 

FICTION: I am a failure. Yes, I make mistakes, but I am not failing them as a mother. I provide them clean clothes, food to eat, a safe house to live in, and unconditional love. I read them books and help with homework. We paint finger nails and pictures to hang on our wall. I work hard to provide for them. I want them to look up to me. I want to be a good example for them. I want their answer, when asked who their hero is, to be me. Is that selfish? Maybe. But, I don’t care. I want to be someone they want to be. 

WISH: I wish I would stop beating myself up when I feel inadequate. Or feeling guilty when I have to yell at the kids to get them to listen to me. Because I’ve said something four times. Because they still ignore me. And then someone gets hurt because they didn’t listen to me. And falls off of the couch because they refuse to stop jumping on it. 
{Please tell me I’m not the only one}
I can’t tell you how many times I have gone to my husband crying asking if I’m a good mother. Every time he says I am. Every. Single. Time. So why do I doubt myself. Why can’t I see it the way he sees it?

TRUTH: A lot of things have been happening in my family.    <Both good and bad> 

We've had a family tragedy, grandparents have come to visit, I've accepted a new job, I've been late to work almost everyday this past month…and, well, life in general. I feel like we've been off our A-Game and it’s high time we get back on it. 

Quite frankly, not being on a routine is exhausting. 

I hope that from here on out, I can just keep calm and mother on. Take a deep breath, go on a walk, and/or eat a cupcake. 
Whatever it is that will help me get it together.